The Importance of Dating Your Spouse

Our nest is full

Our nest is full

We are not empty nesters nor are we approaching that anytime soon.  That does not mean we should not be thinking about it, especially as it relates to our marriage.  The story in the Wall Street Journal this morning brought this up again for me with some sad commentary of couples who had grown apart.  This tells those of us who are currently raising kids to pay attention to our marriages now because we want to know our spouse when it is just the two of us again.  (story) The article said that in “1990, fewer than 1 in 10 individuals who divorced were 50 or older. Almost 20 years later, that number jumped to more than 1 in 4. In 2009, more than 600,000 people ages 50 and over got divorced.”  That is alarming!

So, what do we do?  I know how hard it can be for parents of young children to get out and have a date night.  We have a very tight budget, so we don’t have money to go out or hire a sitter.  What my wife and I do is have a date night.  That is a night when we put the kids to bed and do something together at home.  We might watch a movie or show of some sort.  We maybe will play a game or have a conversation.  The point is not to spend a lot of money; the point is to spend time together.  The goal is to date each other in the one way we really can right now.

My hope is that our kids will grow up and we will know each other better than we do now making those years that much more enjoyable for us.  I believe it is possible and worth fighting for.



  1. I saw that article too and am not overly surprised. Women get overly wrapped up in kids and men in their jobs.

    As for date night, Frugal Girl posted on this a while back. Here’s her post on how her & her husband did it on a tight budget. It sounds similar to what you’re doing but might give you some ideas.

    My daughter used to get so frustrated that we put our marriage before her – she wanted to be the center of attention at all times! Then she got to college and was one of the few whose parents were still on their first marriage. She changed her tune in a hurry about that. Decided that as odd as we were, our household was much better than most anyone she met. One of God’s big blessings was that her first roommate was one of the few with a normal and healthy family dynamic. It made her adjustment to living away much easier.

    Can you tell I have a little extra time tonight to leave comments? Wish I had time more often to do that.


    1. That is a great testimony of why this matters. It is great you modeled that so well for your daughter. Also, I will check that website out. There might be some ideas there we can do.

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